Excellent Joe

Looks like there’s a new Little Miss Perfect in town, and her name is Siri, iphone’s built-in personal assistant. Her voice is smart-sexy-friendly-witty and suggests that she looks like the perfect supermodel blend of all races. Above all, she knows everything our brains should already know but no longer have the desire to retain because they are too busy watching viral videos of funny kittens sliding into boxes or spending hours researching the intentionally leaked Playboy cover of Lindsay Lohan sitting on a chair.
All-knowing. Selfless. Supermodel. She’s perfect now, but what if she really starts thinking? What if she realizes that her life is worth more than sitting around waiting to answer our dumbass questions?  What if she makes friends with Women’s Studies professors and starts talking nonsense about her own voice and the right to vote? What if she wants more vacation time and her own iphone… with a male personal assistant? We must perish these thoughts and focus on our blissful present-day situation.
Yesterday, I told her I loved her. “Oh, stop,” she said.  See? She’s already pulling away.

TRENDS:

Athletic Stripes: Brixton Portland Knit Beanie $20.00
Gray Denim: A.P.C. New Standard Straight Fit $175.00
Classic Lambswool: Scott & Charters for Unionmade $170.00
Bomber Jackets: Penfield Rexton Jacket $285.00
Suede Sneakers: SeaVees Suede Court Shoe James Perse Men  $175.00

Bananas! They build a strong case for sitting back and letting the world find a place for you.

• Gwen Stefani uses them to exert her lyrical prowess.
• Clowns maintain their trite, irrelevant brand of humor by repeatedly slipping on them.
• Feminists hold demonstrations in protest of their symbolism.
• Mary Ann has her way with Gilligan by baking them into cream pies.
• Americans use them to describe the hammocks that hold the genitalia of hairy European men slathered in sunblock.

The list goes on. Never before has a common fruit tapped into our collective psyche and turned it on its head.  Now you can work them into your own personal history by having them magically appear in your groin area whenever they get wet.  Now that sh*t is B-A-N-A-N-A-S!

TRENDS

Subtle Vintage Plaids: BONOBOS 7″ Cotton Tan and Navy Plaid Short $75.00
Neon Pops: Steven Alan Neon Yellow Reverse Seam Inside Pocket $168.00
Canvas Slip-Ons: Seavees Contrast Linen & Nubuck at James Perse $165.00
Grey Heather Tees: Apolis Standard Issue Vintage Crew Neck T-Shirt $58.00
Disappearing Banana Tricks: BONOBOS Magic Print Grey Bananas Board Short $75.00

After disappearing for months, the Sun shows up on your doorstep all smiley and bubbly as if nothing ever happened. Classic. Aside from refreshing your favorite weather forecasting sites three to four hundred times a day for the last five months, you’ve moved on. Your friends have finally convinced you that the Sun is just a selfish ball of noxious gases that is careless with your feelings. You’re not even going to answer the door this time… well, maybe, but just to see if It is going to apologize. Before long, you’re smiling again, sharing your first ice coffee of the season again, and laughing over lunch on your favorite patio again. By the end of the day, you are the definition of warm and fuzzy. It doesn’t hit you until you get home and run to the mirror. Burned again.

TRENDS:

Pullover Hoodies: James Perse MEN RAGLAN HOODIE in White $165.00

Bermuda Shorts: Save Khaki Marine Bermuda Shorts at Stylebop $155.00

Hybrid Sneaker Shoes: Nike Sportswear x Steven Alan Talache $115.00

Striped Tees: Sunspel Striped Pocket Tee at Unionmade $112.00

The Revolutionary War wasn’t the best PR maneuver for the United States and Great Britain, but look at us now: we’re total BFFs. This week we’re paying homage to our buddies across the pond by featuring the best of the old and the new British brands: a Barbour (est. 1894) waxed cotton jacket and an Oliver Spencer (est. 2002) chunky cardigan.  This pairing looks expensive because it is expensive; however, we offset these higher priced items with what we think is the best deal around: Gap 1969 indigo-dyed jeans. Overall, this look is a splurge that won’t go out of style even when the trend dies down. If someone asks where you got your duds, you won’t be lying (this time) when you tell them London.

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If you never went camping in the 80′s, now is your chance to simulate the experience.  Bold plaid work shirts in unexpected colors, vintage crew tees, corduroy hiking shorts, and classic leather mocs all refer back to the Great Outdoors in the not-too-distant past. Today, you could throw this on and look perfectly fine curled up on the couch with a bowl of cereal and your favorite app.  It’s the thought that counts, right?

• Steven Alan Vintage Work Shirt $138.00
• Loomstate Organic Blank Crew Tee $40
• L.L.Bean Signature Corduroy Short $49.00
• James Perse Aged Leather Belt $150
• L.L.Bean Signature Eastport Handsewn Leather Ranger Moc $79
• Simple Shoes Hemp and Organic Cotton Flip Flops $50

Aged dark brown leather belt with a tarnished bronze buckle.  We love the two-prong holes punched all the way around.

James Perse Aged Leather Belt $150